How to stop Overreacting
Are you quite touchy or people think you are? Do you often overreact?
I think everyone including the calmest of the calmest person has overreacted at one time or the other in this life.
The words came out, you used a detonator to crack the nut, and now it has all blown over you wished that you could unwind the clock.
The reason we often overreact is one of the following:
We imagine the worse
Yes, our imagination runs wild. We have already concluded the book without going past the first paragraph of the first chapter. Most likely we have written the wrong ending.
Your spouse forgot your anniversary may be a genuine forgetfulness. Not that the new size zero lady that moved next door and your hubby are flirting, hence his distraction.
Past experience has shown us what precisely could happen
We already have the t-shirt and signed several autographs with this story. We have been down this path several times before so we are the pros and the experts in this matter.
That guy in the white BMW that has just cut you up in traffic is just another arrogant full of themselves road raging individual.
No one can pull the wool over our eyes this time. It ain’t gonna happen. Well, once again, this may just be a different story!
The guy in this white BMW that is cutting you up may not be a so and so (<- all the unpleasant words you called the last one).
This one may just be one who has just passed his driving test and trying to learn how to use their car!
Past events have left a sour taste
This may seem like I am repeating myself from the last point. But there is a subtle difference here.
Say you find you are always ending a courtship before it has even taken off the ground before.
Maybe you were ‘dumped’ painfully before. You are now overprotective of getting hurt once again.
Maybe you have had a traumatic experience such as abuse, death or other life’s painful stabs.
It seems natural to have your guard up and protect yourself.
What you can do
Of course, not every response is an overreaction. Sometimes we do things impulsively that could well save a life or keep us or a loved one out of danger.
We must heed to the voice of the Spirit and trust our instincts. Yes, it is better to overreact (and look like a fool later) than to be sorry! However, there are times when we know that the incident did not call for such a reaction.
In such cases:
- Change your thinking. Example if you know you are always overthinking and imagining things to the nth infinitive power, then STOP. Over thinking can make you a suspicious character, often wary of other people’s (good) intentions.
- Deal with anger. If you are often angry, chances is that you are often overreacting too. Get to the root of the anger issue and deal with it.
- Halt before you go too far. If you know that you are already letting it loose, emitting too much steam, stop in your tracks before the situation grows exponentially. Being aware of your emotions and putting a check to it, example becoming jealous without cause, will put a stop to further overreaction.
- Give the benefit of the doubt. That someone ‘refuses’ to sit next to you in the church pew does not mean they are now the devil personified. Why do you think they have ‘refused’ to do so? What if the individual just can’t see very well from the 10th row and prefers to sit more to the front? Yep, there are legal reasons besides someone bent on getting you upset.
We must always learn to put things into perspective. We need to ask ourselves how much does it matter anyway?
The fact that someone even deliberately cut you in traffic, is not something you will even remember in the next 10 minutes or if you have an elephant unforgettable memory, it is not something you are going to remember a week from now!
The question to ask yourself, ‘is it really worth getting upset about?’ ‘Do I have to overreact?’
If the answer is No, which invariably it is, then let it go!
About The Author
I heard a story that fits well with what you’ve said here. Many years ago, two monks were walking on the road when they came upon an aristocratic woman. She demanded to be carried over a puddle blocking the road. The older monk did so, and she left without thanking him. That evening, the younger monk said, “You’re so calm! Aren’t you upset that the woman was rude and didn’t even thank you?” The older monk replied, “I put that woman down hours ago! Why are you still carrying her?”