What must it feel like being very old?
The other week, my great aunt turned 98. Or was it 97? Isn’t it amazing that when you get to a certain age, the numbers all ‘seem’ to merge into one?
I am acutely aware, that is sure not a fair statement to make even though it may be the brutal truth. For an 8 year old, to them, being 7 is a BIG difference. I don’t imagine so in your nineties. Do you?
I however got thinking…my goodness, what must it feel like to be in your nineties?
While, I am so happy my great aunt is that great ripe age, and I want her to live forever, the fact is that I know that is not the reality. She is in very good health, has her wits and brains about her (even writing a book in the last year, kudos nan!), but what occupies her thoughts?
I decided to venture into her mind (or rather the mind of someone that age) and imagine what it may feel like…
What happens when I leave this earth?
One thing is for sure, ‘death’ becomes a friend or a foe. As a Christian, I am not afraid of death because I believe in the after life and a sure better life than the one I lived on earth.
But what do others think happens after they close their eyes for all of eternity? Do they fear the unknown? Have they given much thought to what if after all, this after life was true? Does the counting down days become one of anxiety or one of ambivalence? Or does one not consider it at all?
Where are all my friends?
It is a blessing to be in your 90s. However, I remember when my great aunt’s elder sister died, it seemed like the end of the world. Her sister too had lived till the grand age of 92.
However, my great aunt was besides herself. In spite of the fact, her parents, her husband, friends, cousins and so many had left this world, the one person she had known all her life (at the time she was 90!), was now gone.
It was a devastating blow for her and very worrying for us concerning her emotional state. It was a very lonely moment for her. I could feel for her deeply… She would have shared many secrets with her sister, grown up together with her, had so many memories with her. In an instant that was all gone.
Don’t call me elderly
One ‘mature’ lady in my church, says that she does not like being referred to as elderly. That got me thinking. We must think of the words we use to refer to the older generation.
No one likes being called old even when they are. Some may however carry their years with great pride and are proud to be even called ancient. But let’s be sensitive about older people in general. In the heart of an 85 year old, is the spirit of a 30 year old.
Yes, the spirit never ages. The outer body may age, but the truth is most of us never match our spirit in age. Even at 30, we still think we can run as fast as we did at 15!
Most times, older people have been conditioned by society, stereotypes, and people around them to think that they are old and therefore incapable. But everyone is different…
I know an 80 year old lady for instance that runs a Zumba class…yes you heard me right…she RUNS the class…she is the instructor. She only recently retired a few years ago as a nurse, even doing night duties. But inside her is the mind of a lady half her age. And guess what, she looks decades younger!
Please do not neglect ‘old’ people
Now, I am not going to go on spelling out all the thoughts of getting older, because just with the few above, we can get the picture.
The point I want to make, and a strong one, is not to neglect old people. Who knows, maybe you may live just as long. Imagine what your thoughts might potentially be… full of memories, happy and sad, possibly regrets and achievements, and loneliness.
It is important, that we make out time for the older generation.
Give them a purpose for living.
Keep them active and young at heart. Old age should be a blessing not a punishment. Think of their emotional and mental health. Exercise a lot of patience with them too. Visit them, do not forget about them.
Let’s give our older generation something to smile about. Because even at that age, they can still be useful. Old does not equate to stupid. Don’t see them as a burden to society. Don’t see them as people who have received their boarding pass to their eternal journey.
They are relevant.
They can be relevant.
In the Bible, God called an man called Moses at the age of 80 to take up a mammoth project. The Good Book also says that in old men shall have dreams. It shows we are never too old. Dreams do not expire with age. It is never late.
Give older people opportunities to share their experiences (which is still relevant in today’s world no matter how advanced society is). Listen to their words. See the jewel and listen out for the wisdom in them.
And above all make each of their days count.
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An amazing article!! Understanding the feelings of our grandparents making their dreams still alive in their heart is very important. I really liked the way the whole article is portrayed. Great work by Zoe!